Sunday, October 25, 2015

bedtime story

https://soundcloud.com/slo-children/mummy-lullaby
 
transcript:
 
 
Sofia: Can you answer it on your phone?

Dada: what?

S: ask Siri if mummies are real?
D: (singing) Are mummies real I want to know
I want to ask a mummy if she is real.
If I could find a mummy,
I would like to ask a mummy.
Maybe I could ask mommy
if she knows a mummy?
Do you think Mommy knows a mummy?
Maybe mommy knows a mummy.
Mommy knows a mummy. Maybe.
if she doesn't
I'll have to ask a...

S: a wasn't

D: a wasn't!
Only a wasn't would know
wouldn't he
or she
or nobody.
Is a mummy real?
How about you
Are you a mummy,
little bunny?
How about you
are you a mummy,
cute little bunny
wrapped up in your sheet
tight?
S: Are you talking to me?
D: Talking to you.
Lucia: No, I'm a bunny!
D: (singing) Are you a bunny too,
little mummy?
Are you a little mummy bunny
in your little bunny sack?
In your mummy sack?
All the mummies all the mummies
sing so funny
they sing inside their sheets
so sweetly
They sing so real
I think it's true,
they're real.
Don't you?
S: Only in Egypt, right?
D: Is that true,
little bunny mummy?
I think
Mummies are everywhere now.
Once upon a time they only lived there
in Egypt
under pyramids
in a pyramid scheme
to live forever
wrapped up for the afterlife
but now they're here in our culture, and the're alive!
They're everywhere, even in Hotel Transylvania
S: I think I know what mummies are.
I actually do!
D: What are they?
S: They are dead people who are wrapped in bandages. But as a costume you would wrap yourself in toilet paper and tape it onto you.
D: (singing) Wrap your self up in toiliet paper if you wanna be a mummy that's what you do
S: and you paint your face black
D: (singing) You paint your face black
S: Faybe i'll go trick or treaigng or maybe i won't. I'm thinking maybe if I don't go trick or treating I could become a mommy. And I'll have my face painted so I don't need the toilet paper around my eyes.
(oooh hooooh)
S: yeah, you know
D: (singing) Are you going to be a mummy for hallwoeen? that would be funny,
all wrapped up in toilet paper like a poo. Ooooh
A funny mummy
that would scare you-know-who...
Candace. She's deathly afraid of mummies.
S: There's actually a Phineas and Ferb
where Candace is a mummy,
and she's actually wrapped up in toilet paper.
Dada: Ooooh hooo. You're a funny, fumbly, foamy, gloamy, glummy, gummy gloomy mummy. Ooooh hooo. You're a whammy, bammy, slimy, boomy, balmy, mumbly, family mummy..
S: Would you please look up on your phone if mummies are real? I was really looking forward to it.
D: I know the answer to that question.
S: What?
D: They both are real and aren't real.
S: How do you know?

Monday, October 12, 2015

prescription

Today I'm a little under the weather (head cold) so I got a THOROUGH check up by 2 young doctors.
After the check up they give my prescription:


Okay, you can go outside once a day.

How many stickers can he have a day? 2. OK.

You have to eat medicine 5 times a day

You can have one tattoo a day. I'm going to draw a butterfly on him.

You have to look at your eyes 2 times a day.

You have to get 3 shots  a day.

And you have to blow your nose 6 times a day.

And you have to wash your hands 8 times a day.

And you have to do the thermometer 5 times a day.

And you eat 3 times a day.

And we have to look at his boo boo 8 times a day.

And we have to get your information 35 times a day.

And we have to play games 5 times a day. Card games right? Right. Paw Patrol.

And we're going to show you a picture of you getting married 85 times a day.

And you are having too many screens a day.

And we have to bandages on your boo boo 10 times a day.

And we have to write how you are feeling 9 times a day. Yeah, 9 times a day.

(How am I feeling now?) 

Well, you're feeling kind of sad now.

And you have to do reading 2 times a day.

And you have to visit people two times a day. And the days you have to do it are Sunday and Saturday.

I can have visitors on the weekend?

Or you can visit them if you want, but you have to go in our van.

And you can have tattoos 3 times a day.

 (Wait, we already talked about tattoo, sissy)

And you have to make belief friends 68 times a day.

I have to make belief friends?

Yes, to keep you company.

(And what about dessert? Can I have dessert?)

Dessert 0 times a day.

(I don't get any desserts?)

Only on special occasions. Like Mardi Gran, Or April Fools Day. Or Columbus day.

(Hey, today's Columbus day! so I get one today?)

Yes.

Sofia disappears and comes back with a bowl full of granola. 

Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Love light

Me: We're hitting all the lights today

Sofia: that's because the lights are in love with us.